penguin-napping
a dear friend of mine knows of my crocheting obsession, and i believe she knows that i like penguins. she gave me the best of both worlds when she showed me this.
which only led me to retell a story, not about penguin sweaters, but about a near penguin-napping episode.
a couple christmases ago, it was unseasonably warm in belleville/st.louis, my requisite location for the holidays. my friend mike, an old co-worker from my days slaving in a mall bookstore, made his yearly escape from his temporary residence (so he tells me) of the big state of texas to visit his own family.
we agreed that tolerance levels of familial activities can spread thin, so we would use each other as refuge. one particular rendezvous point was the st. louis zoo in order to take full advantage of sunny skies and light breezes.
i have a tendency to giggle at animals, or rather, my childish reference to “aMiNals”, so most of the trip was interspersing fits of laughter when an occasional anecdote to regale mike with. but then we came upon the penguin habitat. and that’s when scheming started.
the st. louis zoo had recently remodeled this portion of the zoo to make it a little more realistic for our wintery-feathered friends. but it was fashioned in such a way where the rocks, the perch for the penguins, was in arm’s reach of spectators, or people like me, fanatical penguin enthusiasts. ok, now don’t go asking me anything of their physiological components; i just think they’re a damn cute aminal.
at any rate, i was certain i could nab one of the creatures from their post on the rock. all i had to do was reach it, tuck it under my arm and move quickly out of that section of the zoo. if approached by any zoo employees along the way, i could surely convince them that i merely purchased a stuffed penguin from the gift shop. right?
naturally, mike’s guffaws were not confidence boosters indicating that i could actually pull this heist off. and he’s probably right. because when he asked what i would actually do with the penguin if 1) i didn’t get bitten first, 2) did manage to get out of the zoo without being noticed, 3) did survive a car ride thirty minutes away with a hysterical penguin in the backseat, and 4) offered a reasonable explanation to my family as to why i had a penguin in the first place, i realized i hadn’t thoroughly thought the plan through.
i guess housing a penguin in my bathtub in my apartment wouldn’t be considered an acceptable and humane environment. ah well, i’ll just continue to admire their kind from behind the glass.