google me this

everyone has downtime at their jobs, unless you’re uber important and remain frenzied day in and day out. otherwise during lapses of the hustle and bustle, you peruse the internets. admit it.

in nicer weather, i’ll actually leave the office to go shopping or just enjoy some fresh air while lamenting not having my camera with me. read: too many missed photos ops of downtown architecture, tourist antics and general city life. but now that it’s nasty and downright depressing outside, i hide inside, keeping my seat warm behind my computer screen.

i swear i’ve gone to the end of the internets and back. knowing this is clearly an impossibility, i try to think of new things to research. i taught myself (sort of) how to knit while watching youtube demonstrations on the craft. i discovered that finding out where to purchase a terrarium kit is a lot more difficult than it sounds. i’m current on my news and events and celebrity sightings, and i am desperately trying to get in with the cool crowd by viewing more design-y sites. and without renaming all of them here, my links page is a pretty concise laundry list of my all daily stops on nonproductive days.

but on days when my typical cyberhaunts aren’t satiating an appetite for random knowledge, my sights turn to a game i like to call, “does so-and-so have an online presence?” better known as googling names from my past. and this isn’t limited to ex-boyfriends or crushes. anyone i’ve worked with, went to school with or had passing acquaintance with qualifies. (and the scary thing is, my tendency to remember classmates’ names from 5th grade far outweighs somebody new i met just last week.)

so with all that needless prefacing, you’d think i’ve stumbled across the valedictorian of my high school hobnobbing with sir richard branson for one of the coveted spots on the maiden voyage of virgin galactica. or the chick who played lead in nearly every play would be an A-list star, both popular with the paparazzi as well as the UN. but the truth is, i can’t find anyone. nada. zilch.

sure, a name will pop up in a search listing, but one of a few things will happen:
1) it’ll be the right name, wrong person. particularly when maiden names come into play for the females.
2) it may be the right name, but there’s really no mind-blowing details about said person.
3) or, it’ll be some really old information archived from publications, i.e. school newspaper.

the sad thing is, if i did trip upon anyone, i wouldn’t contact them. i have nothing to say. it’s more of a genuine interest to see if growing up in a relatively small town pre-internet would impact who appears online later on life.

my unscientific conclusion? 1) those i’ve known may use the internets, but they have no vested interest in being searchable or 2) everyone is hidden beyond the 2nd page of search results. or 3) there is no conclusion. just more wasted time.

[this may be a bit easier to do if i had a profile on the various online social communities, but i have no interest in facebook, myspace or the like. i s’pose they would cure some segment of the time-wasting i tend to do, but their interfaces among other faults leave me “meh” on the subject.]

10 December 2007