i'm a hugger
the church i grew up in has seen its share of ministers, all of varying levels of rigidity toward catholicism not to mention their own human ills—one left the priesthood because he could no longer devote his life to god; another was an alcoholic; yet another was run out of the parish for reasons unknown to most; and still others left to run more prestigious churches and schools.
i’m no upstanding catholic; in fact, i don’t identify myself as such anymore despite nine years of catholic school and many sundays spent at mass. but when i first met father bill last year during dad’s hospital stay for tracheostomy surgery, i was taken by his twang and his overall presence. he didn’t strike me as a man of the pulpit. despite his holiness, he openly admitted his own errors in life, and he was eager to recount his missteps and offer up life lessons.
last week, mom regaled us with her own tale of how dad first met father bill. father bill had been serving a small parish down in the southern tip of illinois before his transfer back to belleville. he had a previous stint in our area many years ago, but it was for one of the more highfalutin churches. so his transfer was met with some reservation.
after one of his first masses in our church, dad went up to father bill to introduce himself. dad exchanged pleasantries with him and literally welcomed him with open arms.
“i’m a hugger.”
apparently, that made quite the impression on father bill, and he quickly settled into his new role. our church wasn’t like others in the diocese, and my dad was able to open father bill’s eyes to our warmth and hospitable nature.
(“i’m a hugger” became our phrase for the next few days because it wouldn’t be a sissy reunion without some quote to randomly shout out, ending in a simultaneous giggling fit.)
——
after three days of visitation, funeral, and cremation services, it was time for the three ladies to get out for a lighthearted activity. sissy had arranged with some of her friends for an outing to see toy story 3, and she happily invited me and mom. mom mentioned that dad wanted to see it, but we reassured her he was with us anyway.
probably a quarter into the movie, we were introduced to lotso, the pink fuzzy bear you’ve probably seen on billboards to promote the film. his character is the sheriff of the daycare center where woody and friends get dropped off. he’s giving the new toys the lay of the land, welcoming them to their new home, and then he says the unimaginable.
“i’m a hugger.”
in an identical twangy accent that mom had ascribed to dad’s own “i’m a hugger” statement to father bill.
i missed the next few moments of the movie because mom laughed and sissy and i looked at each other in disbelief. we weren’t wrong when we had told mom earlier that dad would be with us during the movie. and i think that comforted all of us.
i look forward to more of life’s little coincidences, nudging me to remember that dad will always be with us in spirit.