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a lost love

perhaps i’ve been distracted by fleeting notions of moving, saving money, restraining myself from purchases of much needed furniture. or, perhaps, going freelance, though wonderful and liberating, simultaneously has me bound by other concerns. and then there’s the other interests i’ve taken up, perhaps you see it as an affair of sorts. and maybe it is. maybe i need some time. to think. to cultivate. to sort myself out.

you do remember when i drifted from you in the past, yes? and i came back, feeling refreshed and renewed, right? hopefully, this is just another cycle, and my affections will return after this hiatus.

in the distance

i tripped upon this love of photography in college while studying audio engineering. after a couple instructors warned each new class that the jobs were few and far between in recording studios and the like, i began to doubt. and rightfully so. fortunately, i got bored during summers and felt the need to educate myself further. photo 1 was the catalyst. booking time in the darkroom, becoming a master at uncoiling rolls of film and recoiling on reels in pitch blackness, breathing in chemical fumes. it was all so organic. from start to finish. from pressing the shutter to black and white prints drying on a rack. it was all mine.

regardless of my captivation, i knew photography wouldn’t be a career. i’ve likened my feeling to that of working in your favorite restaurant. how soon would you grow weary of the same dishes? hell, even top chefs go enjoy a box of mac-n-cheese and a whopper. i was completely content with photography just being a hobby, with the occasional commission or sale of a print.

when my conventional methods were loosing a battle with my laziness, the boy convinced me to go digital. and i did, begrudgingly at first, but soon i enjoyed the instant gratification. i had no excuse anymore not to produce work. a photo blog was born. and though late to the party of photo blogging, i thought for sure i’d stick with it.

sadly, i didn’t. other life things got in the way. i was still taking photos, just not publishing them. then i noticed a disturbing trend where i really only reached for my camera when i was packing a bag to travel somewhere.

and even more disturbing: during my most recent jaunt, i came home with 23 exposures. that’s less than a real roll of film. and the above photo is 1 of 3 images i’ve felt worthy enough to upload to flickr.

how far i have fallen. if i sound a bit melancholy, it is intended. photography represented my time in college and thereafter, when life was simpler, when i didn’t understand everything around me, and yet, i remained content. or so i remember it. perhaps even that part is fading away.

pretty things

the downward spiral…

it started with a marathon session of project runway from seasons past one saturday afternoon. never seeing the show before, and usually one to avoid the hype surrounding shows of the reality realm, i watched with hesitation. but what can i say? seeing santino’s impression of tim gunn kinda got me hooked. that, and the clothes. and the creativity and the know-how and the time constraints behind crafting said clothes.

never having touched a sewing machine, watching PR made me want to learn to sew, in hopes that i could at least make a simple a-line skirt.

well, i done did that after the lovely cinnamon took the time to mold me, sitting patiently by as i wrestled with the seam ripper and forgetting to put the zipper foot down during its installation. all of which, i took in stride because i honestly want to become good at this.

nearing completion on my second skirt, with hopes of perhaps making trousers for myself—hell, the fabric is already purchased, may as well run with it—i started looking at more designs. seeking out designers to possibly emulate in simpler terms. looking at runway shows from all the fashion weeks that just took place. i even picked up a japanese magazine highlighting collections from SS 2008 in milan and new york.

i’m far from anything of grandeur, but it’s been a long time since i’ve been this enamoured by anything. even if my own sewing and construction doesn’t get beyond simple patterns and doesn’t evolve into the actual design process, i do think i’ll continue to at least educate myself on the trade itself. (OOA, i’m trying to make you proud. perhaps you could pass along some sites to further my edumacation? thanks, doll.)

what's new on etsy

most of the jewelry i made in the beginning of this hobby of mine was, to put it mildy, crap. i was proud that i made something with my own two hands, but many of those initial pieces have since been destroyed and something new was constructed.

as i perfect techniques, consider the actual design development, and think about what i’d actually buy, the end product is progressing and evolving. and that makes me happy.

pendant

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Photos from Flickr